Hey Hey! Ho Ho! Boring Clothes Have Got to Go!
Whites folded, we ventured out into the usual sunny, freezing weather to run some errands at Laurel Village and found the tony shopping strip the site of a demonstration. "Hey shoppers! Beware! The Gap is unfair!" chanted a motherly looking woman with a bullhorn outside the Baby Gap store, while a man dressed as a tree attempted to pass out tracts to tots, and the drivers of Mercedes SUVs circled carefully around the whole scene, as though worried someone might ask them for money. Good Lord! we imagined them thinking. What's next -- anti-IMF protests in the doorway of the Charles Schwab?
"Save the Redwoods! Boycott the Gap!" read the pamphlets, and Dog Bites was forced to approve. We think everyone should boycott the Gap, and Banana Republic too, though it must be said our objections are less on ecological than aesthetic grounds. First of all, Banana's pants are cut with the butts way too big, and the photographs in the company's catalogs are, like, really pretentious.
"Your comments on how horribly people dress really hit home -- just the prior evening a musician friend and I were discussing the marked lack of imagination and gross insecurity that goes into the bulk of San Francisco's clothing choices," writes a reader identifying herself as Huge Fan Heather. "Please! With the Gap already! How frightening are their ads? 'Everybody in ....' Hey America, let's all dress the same. What is this, Communist China?!"